Has anyone else had this experience? Because it happened to me today and it creeped me out. Boredom being a prime motivator, I was diddling with the Internet after work and thought I'd look up an old boyfriend and see if anyone (like other old girlfriends) had any blogs where they made snarky comments about him. I love snarky comments about anyone, and snarky comments about him would be primo stuff.
Because this guy was a total psychic drain, I mean, it was like dating someone who was continually pouring Draino into your ear to eat away your brain ("I love you--I can't imagine what life would be like without you..." nice words but since he said the same thing to every girl he met in a bar, it was more-or-less just a few ounces of Draino). He only said this crap so you would do what he wanted, e.g. let him play fast-and-loose with your emotions and suck the life out of you without any nasty complications such as marriage or any kind of a committment that might have at least given you a decent reason for hanging around wasting all your fertile years on a total bozo. I mean, I knew if he wasn't with me, he was with someone else, but because of that darn Draino eating away at my brain, I let him get away with it. And to make matters worse, he had this arrogant, "all the girls I've ever dated have been better for the experience" attitude, which, in retrospect, sort of proves it had to be some kind of Draino he was pouring into my ear, because why else would I have ever dated someone who says crap like that for any length of time? I can't even think about that now without laughing until blood pours out of my eyes.
Enough about that. Back to what creeped me out.
So, because I was missing my husband (who has been away for a week and I really, really miss him) and it's the holiday season and both my parents are dead and I was feeling a little down-in-the-mouth, I said, well, heck, I'll search the Internet for references to this guy, hoping to find some blog with some snarky comments about him. Which would have been just so cool and really make me feel better.
Well, I didn't find any references to him, except his own. How totally typical. He's a geezer now (and from his pictures on the Internet, he looks like a geezer which did make me feel better, although he is also dating this young woman born in 1970, which made me feel worse--for her--because this guy is now pouring Draino into her ear...) and like so many geezers, he's gotten into geneology. So, he's published a bunch of family geneology stuff for his family, along with scads of family pictures.
How nice for them.
Now here's the creepy part.
He mentioned me in his geneology. I was never married to him, and he's got me in his freakin' geneology. As his friend. I about vomited. We were never married. We never procreated. In fact, thanks to him, I completely missed the procreation window of opportunity (okay, not entirely his fault--I have to take some responsibility for not telling him to piss off when I realized what a jerk he was, but you get my drift...).
As far as I know, the rules about geneology are that you only include people you are married to, or procreate with, because it's supposed to be a chart about whose genes got stirred together with whom's (not grammatically correct but you understand) to make other branches (or show biological dead ends--like him) on the family tree.
What makes this situation so revolting is that this is the only reference to me under my maiden name on the entire Internet. I searched and searched for other references to me, but it was all in vain. The fact that people only know me, now, under my married name, didn't bother me until today.
So my only presence as my "natural born self" as far as the electronic world is concerned, is as this guy's G-D friend. Not only is my only claim to fame as my true, unbonded self, a connection which I wish I had never had to this Draino-weilding guy, he also entered my freakin' birth date wrong! He's off by 26 days, so he didn't even get the facts right that he entered into the family history.
I wanted to write this daft sod and tell him to take me out of there, but the problem is, he's creeped me out now and I don't want any contact with him. Grrh.
Why would he do this? Why? I swear I never did anything to deserve being thrown into his family history as "the friend". Oh, I'm not the only one, though. He also threw in this one other babe (the new, young thing born in 1970). I wonder if she knows she is now memoralized for the rest of time as his friend in his family tree? How insulting is that? Is it possible she thinks this is sweet? Perhaps...but only if that Draino ate more of her brain than it ate of mine.
Creepy, creepy, creepy.
I just wish my husband would come home soon.